Ganito Ka Rin Ba Mag-English?

            The following is a letter found at a certain bar in Manila and have been preserved to its original unedited form. Enjoy reading and you may try to direct translation is Tagalog, Pls. read with feelings……

October 1996,

To Marjorie

       I am not surprise or wander why Dennis leave you why? What reason can you think about but you’re very fat body. I thought before that Dennis only use me to his toy but sooner and later I’m realize that he really can’t not beared or stomached to be with you anymore because at first, Dennis say he could not stand you’re habit of making pakialam all his walks (lakad) and always calling to their house what he got home or this or that.

And then he say he get ashame to me either in school or in his family and then asking you to exercise you’re very very, very fat body. But you hate it. Thought you’re the most preetiest girls he knows about. What do you think you are “ Beautiful Girl” of Jose Mari Chan?

       Even you are beautiful face ( to your think) you do not have the right to called me whatsoever or else difference name one time or the other for the real purposed to insults my personality because I’m never call you names either in the front of Dennis or in the backs of Dennis, but if you start already to calling me different name, I don’t have any other choice but to call you other different name to. Like you are a PIG, FAT, OBESSED, OVERWIGHT, AND UGLY SHAPE girl. Shame to you’re body that is to a BUDING.

       You can’t not blame Dennis for exchanging you to me because I am the more sexier that you when you look to us in the mirror. I’m repeat again that you are like Lozada when she is a girl.

Love,

The sexiest Girl of D.M.

P.S.

You say that I’m the bad breathe but who is Dennis want to kissed. Me or you? And the final is me. There you go

Comment:
        Somewhat, the letter had delivered the message well, for me. Even though it was totally wrong grammatically, the feelings of the sender and the thought were still present. It was perfectly shown how the sender wanted to tell Marjorie how fat she was.
        Grammatically wise. the letter had a lot of errors, There are some mistakes in spelling, the direct translations which (for some) had given the wrong thought and the sentence construction was poor too. Most of the mistakes, though, will be easily corrected through studying basic or more complex English.

        Below is a revised edition of the letter above. 

October 1996

To Marjorie,

          I am not surprised or wondered that Dennis left you. What reason can you think about except that you’re really fat. I thought before that Dennis only used me as his toy but later on, I realized that he really can’t bear to be with you anymore because at first, Dennis said he could not stand your intrusive habit whenever he has his scheduled walks. You always call on their house to ask whether he got home.

          He would even tell me that he's ashamed because of you, in both his school or his family. He was asking you to exercise your fat body but you hated it. You thought you were one of the prettiest girls he knew. What do you think you are, a “Beautiful Girl” like Jose Mari Chan was referring to?

          Even you are beautiful, just as you think, you don’t have the right to call me whichever name you would like to just to insult my personality. I never even called you a different name, whether Dennis is there or not, but you did. I didn’t have any choice but to call you with different just to insult your fat body.

          You can’t blame Dennis for choosing me over you because I am sexier even when you compare our reflections. You resemble Lozada when she was a girl.

Love,

The sexiest Girl of D.M.

P.S.

You said that I have bad breath but who did Dennis want to kiss? you or me? And he chose me.